Monday Musing // How could you do this to me?

Today was not a good day. Well there were some good things, like my professor canceling the final, chinese food with coworkers, and the biggest hugs from Tyler...but other than that...this day has been the pits. The pits.

Of course it happens right after General Conference weekend. Of course, it happens on the last full week of school. Of course it involves my one gateway to school work and academic success...my computer.

Yes, my computer hard drive crashed today and it is unrecoverable. That means all of my projects, gone. All of my hard work wiped away. All of it, except for the decent little pieces of work that I have put away on a 4GB Sandisk Cruzer.

Today, I didn't even cry about it. I didn't even rage. I had to silently push back the tears and carry on, because not everybody cares about how helpless or useless or disheveled or downtrodden you feel. That's life.

So...I found myself fighting off the tears with a sore throat and an itchy nose and a burning face thinking, "How could you do this to me, Heavenly Father? How? How could this happen now? Why?"

And I wanted to scream and cry and throw things, but I didn't...because it was a time where I really had to put things into perspective.

I had to take a moment to show my gratitude.

I am overwhelmed still and tired. And worried. And hoping that my computer can be at least repaired in some decent way very soon. So for now, watch this video and listen to this talk.



It's all worth it.

I'm trying to be grateful.

But I'm not perfect.

But sometimes trying is enough.

That's all.

+ s t a y // g o l d